Beer review

By Clemens Schally & Laurens Willeme

Listening to some high-brow, better than you, underground experimental Jazz, we sat down to indulge our taste buds in some supreme golden hop and yeast ambrosia. Our last minute trip to Jumbo provided us with two unique (looking) beers, one Dutch, the other Belgian, to be reviewed by us, an international team consisting of one questionably Dutch and a dubiously Belgian expert. Having already finished a crate of Heineken, we felt ready to subject ourselves to better beers and share the experience with you, our dear readers.

First up, representing the Netherlands, Cinema brewery’s King Kong Tripel (8%) – Advertised in a funky looking bottle, sporting the motif of its namesake ape, claiming to taste like coconut and banana. Poured into a glass, the beer revealed its dark-amber colour. Immediately noticeable was the presence of yeast suspensions (for all we know it might have also been the mysterious coconut ingredient). One sip down, Laurens shared his first impression: “This beer reminds me of Limburg”. Failing to elaborate on what this meant, we determined that this could be attributable to the complex, well rounded taste, being a marriage of spicy and slightly fruity flavours supported by a strong, bitter hops aftertaste. However, tasting more like an IPA than a Tripel, Clemens, after intense discussion, concluded that it compared to an IPA like a chimp to a gorilla.

Score:

CLEMENS: 42/50

LAURENS: 3.1415/4

Rotten Tomatoes: 7.1/10

The second beer to taste, representing Belgium, was “Cornet – Oaked” (8.5%). Sporting a fancy knight on its label, our expectations were high. The first thing we noticed when pouring, was the far larger, but lighter head. We perceived the smell as slightly soapy and not particularly appetising. Tasting it we were offered a far more unbalanced palette. After an overly short sweet hint of flavour, with subtle notes of smoked wood, only a slightly bitter aftertaste remained. It reminded us of a standard Palm beer, a comparison the brewery should not be proud of. Concluding that all this “pretty utilitarian” beer had to offer was a “bitter communist aftertaste”, we decided to cleanse our palettes with a good shot of vodka.

Score:

Laurens: 4.5/10

Clemens: 8/20

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